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Daisy Gonzalez: resilient, an anxious thinker & free-spirited.

The struggle of "Who am I ?"

Daisy Gonzalez is an indecisive young individual who wants to try a taste of everything at once. My mother even tells me "tu piensas mucho" (you think too much).


Do I want to be a writer, a photographer, a flight attendant, a snobby influencer, a director, a mother, a boss, a philanthropist, a teacher?.. the list goes on. My indecisiveness has constantly put me in a bubble of stress of what I want to do with my life. My mindset personally reminds me of the metaphor of the Fig Tree analogy from the “Bell Jar” by Sylvia Plath. 


Additionally, my idenity is a first generation Latina who has been learning to live life with my inersectionality. After I graduated high school my dream was to attend a college in new york city where I would pursue a career in the fashion industry. I was ready to become a resilent resident living in the busy city. My dream was later crushed when I realized I was not born in a privilege world where this lavish lifestyle was possible for 18 year old me. I was completely miserable. I thought my life was over. What do i do now? My selfishness later wished I was born into a rich family. I questioned the sky "why was this my life"?


I decided to study at my local community college. It wasnt what I wanted but it was better than nothing. After an endless cold long fall semester of taking the basic classes (english, psychology, history, etc). I decided to take a class about social media. During the course, I realized that I have gained a massive interest in studying communications.

 

Striving For Change 

Community college was lonesome for me. I did not have the greatest social life as I just strictly prioritized only my studies and kept my head low reading endless books and dealing with an intense eating disorder. Thankfully I recovered. I decided to apply at the University of Connecticut. Thankfully I was able to be the first one in my family to attend a university after countless battles with financial aid. I am eternally grateful for my parents for investing their time and finances so I can attend UConn.


Before entering univeristy I was a shy hermit in a shell. I never left my house and struggled to keep a conversation. When I first stepped on campus I was immediately terrified.I even sobbed when I was dropped off. I was dissocating the entire first few weeks of college. I slowly adapted to my new enviroment. My first year at college completely changed my life. I never experienced so many things at once. It felt like a never-ending nightmare and the best dream ever all at once. I made fair-weathered friends that I never saw again and made others that have become important in my life. One thing that struck me out was the unidvided attention from boys. this was an odd experience because i never reciaved that attention in high school. I was freaked out. I experienced the bad roommate, got way too drunk many nights, experienced east coast cold nights walking home, cried over boys, lost my best friend, and had endless nights at the library. I came out of my shell. I changed for the better.


At 21 years old, I am spending my last summer as a college student. As I have more time to pond. I am entering my senior year in late August as I am extremely terrified. I am not ready. But I am extremely grateful for what college has given me. such as my friends, an education, motivation to make my parents happy, opportunitues, game days,nights out, and long pondering walks. I also stumbled upon myself in a relationship with a hazel-eyed boy who makes work on myself to be a better version of myself for him and for myself.



Please feel free to connect with me on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn






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